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that sucks
In 3 days time, not only will it go down to 32 degrees at night, but it won’t get much warmer than 45 during the day and - it will be cloudy.
My means and processes for insulating and keeping the space warm continue. Some nights, as it colder, I play “identify the draft” and as promised, I don’t do anything about it unless I now there are going to be several full days of cold in a row.
But even the mad kitten is starting to spend more time indoors.
And I am holding out on buying my wonder heaters and depending on these lame little baseboard type heaters for a very good reason. I don’t want the fact that a forced air heater can keep kicking on to combat cold to make the place warm. If I was also paying for my electricity the bill would go through the roof then. I want, for another few weeks, to get my space all insulated and sealed off enough to maintain a minimum of 65 degrees with the lame-o heaters, then I can bring in the blown air with a thermostat and will be happy.
I upgraded the compost toilet, since I seem to be having more guests of late, to a charming little rose wallpapered box with a real seat.
And life goes on.
I feel like…I am circling two projects of mine but not working on them yet because I am trying to figure out what they need. One of them, the poem “Ages” I have tentatively started writing but I already know that it is going to push me and I am trying to clear some space in the day to start going back to the library and studying. The other, the video of “Striking a Match” keeps almost happening…and then I back off because the idea just isn’t right.
But…this is progress. The fact that I can have a fully formed idea and then go “ahhhhhhh…no, it can be better” and recognizing that my topics are demanding I go learn is new. I was talking to some one about “the city of love” and trying to explain how it is not yet at the point where I can down and write to it, but that I am at the point where I can pick similar pieces of the theme and work on getting my skills up to doing the small bits first.
What I think is funny…and I have been having this conversation with quite a few people…is how there is a strong cultural myth about art that the moment of inspiration is the truest to the art and the artist. Its like there are room fulls of people sitting around waiting for a flash of light before they dare to begin. What makes up that moment of inspiration is in side you already, it just hasn’t had to cause an explosion to gain your attention.
Someone I know was bemoaning that she wanted to paint again but dreading the fact that it has been so long and been so loaded with other issues that she knows if she starts painting and they suck…as they will because she is out of practice and they won’ match what she sees in her head…that she will get frustrated and disappointed and give up again.
So I thought about it and decided that she should set herself to make 4 paintings. The first 3 must absolutely suck. If they even show the slightest sign of pulling themselves together and having a redeeming inch of quality on the canvas that she needed to exert all of her skill to undo that. She needed to “do herself badly” on the canvas. But not in a scholcky and fast way, but with as much attention to detail and effort as she brings to all her paintings. Then, on the 4th painting, she is free to paint as well as she can.
She thought I had lost my mind at first and then thought about it and decided it was a good idea.
And I am thinking of taking my own advice and when I get stuck on writing a piece, go ahead with it and make it as awful as I can. Then go back and use it as something to edit off. For me, I work best if I have something on paper I can manhandle.
I am resisting temptation of getting a dog. I just can’t because I know next year is going to have a fair amount of travel in it for me and I can’t I can’t I can’t.
Not to mention it would send MK over the edge. She is already having jealous fits. She has gone from hiding from company, to enjoying company to sitting on top of my head and expressing her ownership of me in front of company.
Ok, I am a little more organized in my head then yesterday (which would not be hard to do). So off to get some work done and I will be back later.
>
My means and processes for insulating and keeping the space warm continue. Some nights, as it colder, I play “identify the draft” and as promised, I don’t do anything about it unless I now there are going to be several full days of cold in a row.
But even the mad kitten is starting to spend more time indoors.
And I am holding out on buying my wonder heaters and depending on these lame little baseboard type heaters for a very good reason. I don’t want the fact that a forced air heater can keep kicking on to combat cold to make the place warm. If I was also paying for my electricity the bill would go through the roof then. I want, for another few weeks, to get my space all insulated and sealed off enough to maintain a minimum of 65 degrees with the lame-o heaters, then I can bring in the blown air with a thermostat and will be happy.
I upgraded the compost toilet, since I seem to be having more guests of late, to a charming little rose wallpapered box with a real seat.
And life goes on.
I feel like…I am circling two projects of mine but not working on them yet because I am trying to figure out what they need. One of them, the poem “Ages” I have tentatively started writing but I already know that it is going to push me and I am trying to clear some space in the day to start going back to the library and studying. The other, the video of “Striking a Match” keeps almost happening…and then I back off because the idea just isn’t right.
But…this is progress. The fact that I can have a fully formed idea and then go “ahhhhhhh…no, it can be better” and recognizing that my topics are demanding I go learn is new. I was talking to some one about “the city of love” and trying to explain how it is not yet at the point where I can down and write to it, but that I am at the point where I can pick similar pieces of the theme and work on getting my skills up to doing the small bits first.
What I think is funny…and I have been having this conversation with quite a few people…is how there is a strong cultural myth about art that the moment of inspiration is the truest to the art and the artist. Its like there are room fulls of people sitting around waiting for a flash of light before they dare to begin. What makes up that moment of inspiration is in side you already, it just hasn’t had to cause an explosion to gain your attention.
Someone I know was bemoaning that she wanted to paint again but dreading the fact that it has been so long and been so loaded with other issues that she knows if she starts painting and they suck…as they will because she is out of practice and they won’ match what she sees in her head…that she will get frustrated and disappointed and give up again.
So I thought about it and decided that she should set herself to make 4 paintings. The first 3 must absolutely suck. If they even show the slightest sign of pulling themselves together and having a redeeming inch of quality on the canvas that she needed to exert all of her skill to undo that. She needed to “do herself badly” on the canvas. But not in a scholcky and fast way, but with as much attention to detail and effort as she brings to all her paintings. Then, on the 4th painting, she is free to paint as well as she can.
She thought I had lost my mind at first and then thought about it and decided it was a good idea.
And I am thinking of taking my own advice and when I get stuck on writing a piece, go ahead with it and make it as awful as I can. Then go back and use it as something to edit off. For me, I work best if I have something on paper I can manhandle.
I am resisting temptation of getting a dog. I just can’t because I know next year is going to have a fair amount of travel in it for me and I can’t I can’t I can’t.
Not to mention it would send MK over the edge. She is already having jealous fits. She has gone from hiding from company, to enjoying company to sitting on top of my head and expressing her ownership of me in front of company.
Ok, I am a little more organized in my head then yesterday (which would not be hard to do). So off to get some work done and I will be back later.
>
Buy http://www.amazon.com/Demon-Providence-d%C3%A9mon/dp/1449526756/ref...">The Demon of Providence on Amazon.com
Video Release: October 2009copyright 2000-2009 Cassandra Tribe.
All rights reserved. For permission to use any of this material please contact info@loveandwords.com
cassandra tribe is a member of newsy.com
All rights reserved. For permission to use any of this material please contact info@loveandwords.com
cassandra tribe is a member of newsy.com
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